Will you take my knitting needle, stick it far up my nose, reach in my frontal lobe and give it a few swirls?
Well apparently he's into motor boating.
dude you just took shreks wife home. what the fuck is wrong with you
when a bears hungry he eats besides shes got her nipples pierced
so far we have 6 big wheels and 10 boxes of wine for the tour de franzia. team drunkslut is favored to win the yellow jersey.
i refuse to be around anyone not wearing a sombrero...its cinco de mayo
It's not that he's ugly its just that being blind folded makes everything less awkward
She just shoved like three McNuggets in her mouth and started sobbing and I have no idea what's going on.
We were on the ground in Tampa for 55 hours and we drank for 30 of them.
We won Spring Training 2013.
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
Next year for Halloween you can be the sword swallower, with a penis shaped sword.
THIS IS NOT A LAUGHING MATTER, CAITLIN. MY PARENTS ARE FUCKING. LOUDLY.
All my friends are going on vacations with their boyfriends while I’m over here in court trying to get a restraining order against my ex....
finals do horrible things to a person. i haven't worn pants since friday
The good news is I woke up fully clothed, on top of my covers, with a half eaten granola bar. So, breakfast was waiting for me and I’m already dressed and ready to go today.
If I had your ass I would rule the world
Randomize
