Every time a guy reaches down to touch my vag, i feel really sorry for all the transgender girls who still have a penis there.
That's weird cause every time i feel a girls vag i feel way worse for all the guys who reached down there and got a penis.
sexting loses it's worth when you accidentally text your boss.
How fortunate humanity is that it need not rely on the female orgasm for procreation
just to let ya know we might have to take a stripper snowboardin sometime
Alright, I can go by eventually,, I don't wanna lose a second pair of shoes this semster from blacking out...
In hindsight combining orgy Thursday with mystery drink madness was begging for failure
she's an english major so her sexts are something i look forward to
How's dinner? Come here? You can bring your boyfriend if you're ok leaving without him
If I'm walking weird, don't judge me. Things got kinda outta hand with the GoPro on.
If I were better looking, this would be the point where I'd resign myself to stripping.
I found a hot kiwi last time and sucked his dick. That's what rooftop bars are made for.
I didn't have anyone to cheers so I tapped my beer on your fish tank... a little too hard
I have been adopted by a clan of drunken skinny dipping tourists.
I turn 40 next week. I deserve to celebrate the end of my 30’s with a 21 year old dick
i made that whipped coffee shit today. took six pouches of instant espresso.
please tell me you didn’t consume six shots of espresso
:)
i can feel colors
Randomize
