i wish swine flu would become a total pandemic so we cld be rid of all the people that are complaining about it
Do you realize we just stole 12 dollars worth of quarters each from the office petty cash just to get manicures? New high or New Low?
I actually had no interest in him until he started talking about his 4 arrests. That made him go from a 5 1/2 to a 8, easily.
still drunk. talking shit to the doc drawing my blood. this has no upside
just gave another girl i passed on the walk of shame a high five
I need to get my pants from under your porch. People are asking questions.
Jesus once told his disciples that its better to hang out with your best friend than give some douche bag a bj.
Agreed. That's like a marriage. For better or worse, till death do us part. I will hold your head over a toilet
Quesedillas should not make me weep and drinking water should not make me feel like god is giving me mouth to mouth. Never again.
I could probably do something when Im able to get enough strength to think about thinking about to stand.
the worst part was waking up this morning to his skrillex ringtone.....when was it ever okay for friends to let other friends go home WITH GUYS LIKE THAT!?
When you're a bigshot ER surgeon and I'm a starving artist, I want you to remember who held your hair last night.
I need to go back to work. I've had so much sex since the shutdown started. last night we tried and a little flag came out saying "nothing is left in here try a week later"
He's the first boyfriend I wouldn't cheat on. This is a really big deal for me
I got here. Mom yelled "drink of the day is blueberry sangria" and next thing I knew I was on a slip and slide.
Randomize
