my mom is pro-life. I dare you to fuck me.
It's a good thing i didn't end up pregnant...i would have had to figure out his last name.
guess who has a date tonight
look at you growing up, going on dates before she hops into bed
Literally just spent 45 minutes converting my paintball gun to shoot condoms....
First Thanksgiving as a grown up: My step dad had to take my brother (who still smells like booze) and I both to our cars this morning, apparently we were at the same bars (same stamps), & I think I broke my elbow. Im thankful to be alive & not incarcerated.
You burned the hair off your arms. Again.
It grows back stronger each time.
I still can't get the taste of her nipples and the udon noodles out of my mouth
I've been here 20 minutes and a sweaty naked man has kissed me on the cheek.
Sending a pic of labia to send to the TN Legislator. Obviously they don't think I know what to do with it so I'm gonna ask them for advice.
I bought emergency contraception until I / we decide how to handle that. And target gave me a gift receipt for it. Awkward.
Sometimes in life you just have to realize the security deposit isn't worth it.
If you had asked me 10 years ago where I thought I'd be right now at 26 years old, I can bet you one million dollars that "tweezing out my nose hairs before I go in to get laser hair removal on my upper lip" would NOT have been the answer
This is why you have to watch more Zombie movies- to prepare for End Times...
Someone just needs to roll me into a blanket burrito and feed me drugs
I wanna print it out and hang it on the fridge like parents do with good report cards.
oh the joys of a picture of a negative pregnancy test
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