Oh man I wish you'd been in the car w/ me today. I followed a school bus home filled w/ young boys and I flipped them off the entire way. They loved it.
goodnight i made you a song goodbye
the only thing i knew about you is that u dated jordan and were potentially interested in a threesome
Okay, I have a threesome with foreigners and suddenly I'm a man-whore
so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
Do you think I can haggle my way to discounted weed on 4.21?
The really sad thing is that I actually practiced crawling in my room yesterday in preparation for today
I just found our entire wall-to-wall from September 2006 printed out and clipped... it's 49 pages. Blackout me is so considerate of bored-at-work me
drunk. just smoked a spliff with a 19yr old hungarian bike taxi driver and bonded over the difficulties of getting weed in a different country. idk y shit like this isnt in the study abroad info packets
Let me be the 15% helpful, 85% useless as shit angel on your shoulder.
Wanna show up on a guy's doorstep and punch him in the balls for me? At least this one isn't a cop.
and i do believe that will be the last time you send me a photograph of our mother in her underwear.
Why do I know about what dicks have been in your mouth but didn't know you had a dog? What kind of friends are we??
When I get off work and you're not around to hang out with all I do is lay around in my underwear and eat potatoes.
Just to let you know we went to the circus yesterday...in case you didn't remember
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