Tell her she's as useless as a condom.
you're the one who masterbates every night to the titanic soundtrack
Rule #1. Nothing comes between you and fantasy sports. Not even a hot chick willing to give you a blow job
woke up with 15 BAGS of hot dog buns in my passenger seat... jameson strikes again
He was actually able to throw up in the bucket from the top bunk. im impressed.
Yo dude either Brian has herpes or he was jerking off to Web MD 'cause I just walked in on him
ARE YOU ALIVE? usually when i say lets start drinking at inappropriate times you come right over. im worried
Instead of centeral air we are getting a margaritaville machine. Thought you would enjoy our logic
Challenge: Try to have your balls hanging out in every picture you take tonight
Challenge Accepted
BOOTY CALL IN EFFECT, BOOTY CALL IN PROCESS, BOOTY CALL ACCEPTED, AND BOOTY CALL INITIATES FRIDAY NIGHT.
She only fucks to metal. I don't know whether to marry her or run for the hills.
You do realize he's just an extension of his penis, right?
Pretty sure my boss knows there's Jack smell coming out of my pores right now... He just gave me a look...
i want to say his dick was in it but not his heart
I'm going to draw something on my chest and I need to incorporate my nipples. Any ideas?
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