so explain again why im purple
no
The dr is doing well, he randomly asked if I was bi
I just saw the Donald Trump of homeless quys walking down the street. He had three shopping carts and a bike.
Sitting in the library lobby in the middle of exam week. Drunk. Dressed as santas slutty helper. Waiting for the student shuttle service. People are clapping for me as they walk by. Tell me how this isnt college
Shes in the fridge organizing my beer collection. I love having a girlfriend with OCD
This does no justice to the amount of paint I'm covered in or the amount of balls I'm tripping.
I need a pic of your cock for our cock collage
I need to stop smoking. I just talked to corn.
he fell down during beer pong and the chick told him to rub the sand out of his pussy and suck it up. i am in love
I'm gonna cougar town the shit out of that prom.
I want to throw pennies on her stage, or just ripping up a dollor bill and throw them one at a time.
She licked my face when I was on the phone with a customer and I just laughed. Im not sure if thats good or bad
When he's drowning in your chest and he muffles out the words 'I just want to live here' that's a compliment right?
I'm gonna do it. I'm gonna write gay mortal kombat fanfic. May the gods be praised for whisky
I just want to smoke weed and be the little spoon all winter. My modern day hibernation.
Randomize
