So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
A little girl and i are having a face making battle in mcdonalds
She started it, but I totally finished it.
Sorry I didn't pick up for your booty call. I usually am asleep at 4:00 on Thursdays. Like a normal person.
You were definitely doing something right. You could only see the colored parts of his eyes a couple of times. I was pretty sure he was dead at some point.
I'm gonna take a nap by the fireplace and pretend like I know what day it is.
Ok despite the fact that both you and I love dick we could have a great marriage
He has started theming his dick pics. I have one he sent his duck has a sombrero on. Another a Barbie is riding it.
He tried to introduce me to one of his friends that kept looking at me and I said "OH NO! I can't do this shit anymore!!" It was like I had a vision of what drunk me would've done in about 20 minutes.
I joined the mile high club last night. I ran a mile while high on coke. It was glorious
Exactly best part of my night he took of his shirt and surprise traveler fanny pack
I'm eating taquitos in the bathtub at 5:30 am. What a great end to the night
Woke up in the hospital naked with my id's taped to my chest. Also apparently puked on two guys, two girls and an escalade (at the same time). Good night.
In all the years we have had drunk sex, have we ever done it in a bed?
We live walking distance from the coors factory. no, we do not have a dry week.
Here's a rundown of my night alone. Danced my ass off in the kitchen to FleetmacWood. Drank a little bit. Ordered $40 worth of Chinese food once the drinks kicked in. Picked up said Chinese in dirty sweatpants and slippers. #livinglife
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