We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.
That's ok. I found a crab leg in my bed and have no pants on.
He passed out while I was riding him, and just when I was about to call it quits he opens his eyes and squeezes my boobs and goes Honk! Honk!
She was about to go down when you guys iced me. Thanks bro
dont worry about it. i always have emergency bong water with me
Because its an amazing idea and you're the only one I can think of that will allow a pirate threesome
I'm telling you the guy came in bought a box of condoms and all three of the chicks that came in behind him followed him to his car. I want his life
The woman in the hospital bed next to me just got diagnosed with flea bites on her vag.
Whaaaaaat? No way.
Now a discussion of pigs vs. dog as carrier.
Could have been worst, could have seen me bent over biting her carpet while her son was inside me, i think i would have respnded with "i was just trying to be quiet"
this is definitely the first time I've ever had an orgasm and then had potatoes smeared on me within the same hour
Fuck I forgot the furry convention was this weekend and now I'm downtown. Way too high for this shit.
I just watched will sing pure imagination from willy wonka and then blow a banana
i dont think sending her flowers will make her forgive you running over her foot.
I'm hungry and horny. DEADLY COMBINATION.
They don't really make a "hey I'm fucking your ex wife" card do they ?
Randomize
