I'm kindof freaked out about my cock not getting up this morning. Cove over later so I can sort this out. Do not post this on texts from last night.
Damn that would have been a great one. Hahah and don't worry...
Do you think they could tell I was high on that conf call?
Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
I put the beer in my little red riding hood basket.
I woke up covered in my own vomit with a pocket full of napkins. I guess I knew I would need them, but was not coherent enough to use them before passing out.
good luck with ur interview. Just show them your confidence and don't make that sucking snot noise. Really don't. Praying for you, love mom
Did you push me into the oil wrestling or did I elect to do it?
You said you wanted to do it, but I gave you a friendly nudge.
She just got out of the car and said "hold on purse.. It's going to be a bumpy ride"
he told me he was watching a movie and he'd be over later and i asked how long. he said 8 inches give or take. you cease to amaze me with the guys you set me up with.
We will. we just need a little inspiration.... in smoke form.
At least Shia Labeouf would encourage me to do this drinking contest
All I'm saying is Europe has not been easy on my vagina.
I just made the most “single life” Amazon order ever: protein bars and condoms.
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
So you realized he wasn't actually cheating on you and now you're trying to unfuck things. Or in this case unfuck Tom.
Randomize
