I guess we had a small kitchen fire somehow when we decided to bake fruitroll ups and croutons...
I developed a drinking game for WoW. Everytime I die, I take a shot.
Please get laid.
Saying he's good in bed would be like saying Soulja Boy is a good rapper, completely unlogical if you've heard him.
While you were puking in the ocean I was rubbing your back saying "Just give it back to Mother Earth".
does it still count as break up sex if it's 4 months later? sorry i'm just looking for an excuse to fuck him.
I made popcorn. Partly so the room doesn't smell like sex, and partly to apologize for the things you saw when you walked in...
There are pre-booty call contracts for a reason. I have no intention of calling you tomorrow.
Do you need my fax number or something?
He might not have any marketable talents, but the kid dry humps like no other.
Lets watch game of thrones and have sex every time someone is naked. It'll be like a drinking game but better.
i think the sex is so good because i get a contact high just from fucking him
She's started this new thing where whenever she drives by random couples talking alone outside she yells "break up! this is your sign!"
Fun times on public transportation. I just had a guy imply that I was racist cause I didn't want to talk to him when I was clearly reading my book and he was clearly on coke.
Do you want me to add this to the list of actions I will state at your intervention
At the bar in my pajamas again
Ummm that is the 3rd time this week and it is Wednesday
That was a beautiful concert to sleep through ...
I know - Don't let me take drugs from strangers anymore
Randomize
