Taking a 35 year old indonesian home, only in vegas ;-)
Ninja stars and alcohol are a bad combo
it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.
i feel sorry that you can never enjoy the feeling of shaved balls
we are sitting in a kindergarden classroom alone chugging beer. look at our lives. look at our choices.
Ok well I'll be up all night studying if you need a wake up call or a place to put your penis.
Let me shower first- i smell like sex and rock climbing (not so sure how that happened)
Can we play rock paper scissor shot again? I want to black out in 15 minutes or less...
I need a burrito and a hug.
Overheard-"sex" and "giblet gravy" in the same sentence. Best thanksgiving ever.
HE ASKED IF I HAD SIBLINGS WHEN I ASKED HIM TO LICK MY ASSHOLE
When you wake up to a porn star on your couch telling you, you better tell your boyfriend about last night.
Hypothetically speaking how does one remove a lamp that they hypothetically superglued to the ceiling?
Acetone nail polish remover, and you lied about studying last night didn't you?
Oh definitely.
I just traded sex to frolic with a box of husky puppies. Is this rock bottom?
Oh yeah I meant to tell you the Tomb Raider looking girl so crop dusted me on the stairway
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