Wanted to apologize for chris browning you when you were on my computer.
Hey, It's Lauren. i wanted to talk to you tonight. I like you, as you know because kyle told you. I was wondering if you liked me too?
Are you in the third fucking grade? Check yes or no.
he was dropping me off and i told him i had to go to the bathroom and i leaned into kiss him and he asked how i went to the bathroom with a tampon up there... he was amazed that their was a third hole...and wanted me to show him where it was
once the "do it" chant starts, any shot at an even remotely dignified party experience is dead.
Don't EVER smell your tampon
He just said "fuck you" to the bowl he's eating things out of
Did i tell you my idea for my life plan? Not the one that involves stripping.
His voice is like having sex with hot chocolate and then suddenly you're pregnant.
My very favorite thing in the whole world is when guys try to booty call her as I'm fucking her. Sucks to suck.
I just came so hard I growled. Definitely found my gspot.
Apparently mr clean magic erasers don't clean blood off the ceiling
Pornhub is still operational. Therefore, the world has NOT come to an end in the blizzard!
Your cock has been in the back of my throat. Co-worker is no longer a sufficient title. Fix that shit ASAP
She always used to joke about becoming a stripper. WHO'S FUNNY NOW?!
I left the party 20 min ago..just thought i would tell you so you wouldnt think i fell in the lake again
Randomize
