I love black thongs
My mom caught just caught me jerking off...in her room.
my affection for youporn is starting to get disturbing... i just thought about sending them a christmas card
I just gift wrapped bread.
think i got pink eye from a stripper in vegas. showgirls did not prepare me adequately for this. be kind, 2010.
Call me pathetic, but saying "tits for ireland" is working out really well on chatroulette today.
No she hasen't showed up to my place yet, last I heard she was puking as she was walking without stopping near the park.
Now accepting hypotheses about how i managed to get a bruise between my boobs....
I know it's pride week, but your asshole is just never supposed to taste like banana.
dude she got out of bed and definitely took a shit then checked her stomach out in the mirror and whispered "well that probably took off five pounds"
We are trying to penis chicken awkward them out. But I think it's a gay wedding. Backfiring. Heavily.
I am lonely and hungry. I need a girlfriend, but I'd settle for my mom.
All I have are vague memories of us eating ham?
I know we agreed to cock block each other from now on buttt I WANT this one. I have felt his penis, it is godly, and I am going to have it inside of me, so shut the fuck up and leave.
I successfully cockblocked 5 people in one night. I wasnt getting any, why should they.
Randomize
