ugh, today is just one of those 'get high before your 8am class' days.
So apparently last night I was running around columbus circle station screaming that Obama was a pussy and that "waterboarding should always be an option" lol
i luv seein jocks study. its like watching monkeys masturbate.
on my arm i have a score card from when we apparently had a competition to see who could harden his nipples fastest..
who won?
THAT is your concern right now?
This chick just checked into her walk of shame on Foursquare... I think I'm in love.
There is something depressing about eating toast in a dark living room by myself using a paper plate that says: "Let's Party!"
your bra might or might not be a decoration on me and my roomies xmas tree haha
I can always tell I missed tequila night based on the hickeys on your neck man. Fucking call me.
I have a callous on the palm of my hand just below my ring finger that is entirely from opening so many beer bottles. I'm strangely proud right now.
I didn't want to but I was drunk in a Disney bathroom with her and had a weak moment.
Blowing lines in the bathroom and trying to get into the mindset of someone who wants to be at work for 12 hours
We watched Purple Rain and then proceeded to have sex while listening to the album. If that's not exactly how Prince would want people to honor him, I don't know what is
you put your dick on my shoulder this morning like it was a fucking parrot
I realize that my conversation topics seem to only be about bees and my cross dressing fiance. Thank you for being my friend.
Family acid trip. They're welcoming me into the family.
What. The. Fuck.
Family acid trip.
Randomize
