just apologized to a random stranger while waiting in line for coffee. last night was that drunk
I mean i might have to drop this class tomorrow. I just walked into a midterm
Now that I'm 21, I feel like I'm letting North Dakota down by not being drunk everyday
She's more than welcome to come too, so long as she has gotten over that me being responsible for the death of her cat thing.
there are chunks of pepperoni under the sheets. can you be here in 10? breakfast in bed?
Sorry for making you give strangers a ride for hits of acid.
So I found the perfect "Yeah I gained weight since high school but it went to all the right places" outfit for the reunion this weekend.
My dad wants to dress like mitt Romney tomorrow night and tell trick or treaters they owe him candy.
my make-up looks really good tonight. I swear it had nothing to do with me finishing all of your strawberry vodka.
I'm back in the dating scene now... Since the legality issue calmed down. And my stalking charges were dropped.
i was thinking shit as she was saying it. it was a sarcasm time loop
I'm chasing my vodka with snickers.
So our bartender was in the bathroom the same time I was so I ordered a beer mid stream.....is that weird?
If it exists, I've probably pregamed it.
I'm trying to behave my vagina this week so I can at least pretend I'm honoring the sanctity of marriage
Randomize
