You're completely useless in the revolution.
I'm drive I can fine osifer
She said if it slipped out one more time she was going to duct tape it in her vagina
I love reading their "i love you more" , "no i love you more" war on facebook today knowing that he hooked up with me last night. I bet i know who wins that one.
I'm at the bass pro shop. They have a river full of trout and turtles, a shooting range, a full bar, and the patriots cheerleaders are here. I now understand why people are rednecks. I may never leave
It was around the time I started requesting "big girl straws" from the bartender for my jack and diets, that I knew I'd probably wake up with my sunglasses on and find my wallet in the shower.
I don't really know how to say this, but I have an oven mitt to return to you tomorrow..
Your 13 year old niece and her best friend half carried you from the beach to the pool where you then clung onto a raft and screamed about having pretty hair.
This is now the friendly bartender typing for him. He wants to be on you. He is going to "destroy your vagina". Good luck and sorry if this woke you up!
Nope. He totaled my car then moved back to Louisiana to work things out with baby mama. I sure know how to pick em
The sex was so bad. I kept sending people snapchats of my face during it.
I have a better chance beating China's military with slap bracelets than this plan has of working.
A girl just invited me over for a blowjob and beer. Is this a trap?
You kept yelling stranger danger at Nick because he was talking to that girl you didn't like. Your not invited ever again.
hey, cheif big dick, where the fuck are my panties.
Randomize