Seeya bye Latvian government! Whammy!
Thought you might like this. Had a dance off with an andy bernard look alike and pissed my bed. All in one night.
bailing my boss out of jail is a great way to spend memorial day
He took out the lube and started calling it fuck fluid
I'm really proud of her, she waited until she was on tiled floor to start puking on the ground
The stripper from Delilahs paid the desk clerk to find out my room #. Either Im doin something very right or she's doing it worng.
That was the gentlest I've ever been bitten in the face by a dog
you broke a plate. told her her wedding china was ugly and you were doing her a favor. then proceeded to break every plate you could get your hands on.
I'll see your cousin, and raise you a sister.
His wife made me pancakes and let me borrow a clean shirt. Should I drop his class or use this to my advantage
Just cause I'm shitfaced wasted every night waking up in random beds all over Manhattan does not mean I'm a mess.
Truth. Respect the hustle.
Ok spinning in the opposite direction thatg the room was spinning was the worst advice ever
Just successfully invited my mom to a drag show. If that doesnt say "im gay" then idk what will.
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
Where'd you go?
Laundry, im. A responsible drunk
Randomize
