he just had his sister send me a message about how he's not a creeper
Was his mother too busy breastfeeding him to do it?
Not just anyone can homewreck on three continents simultaneously
you are my hero
I got her a Nickelback box set.
he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
It was going well until he told me about the 7k he made in college to be in a gay porn
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
I knew it would get worse when I said I think your roommate is watching and he looked over at him and said ... So?
Jsyk, in serious talks of trading blowjobs for soup in bed. I'm sober
they wouldnt let me drive the convertible because i was in a bird suit :(
Well, I watched a girl proposition a shit ton of people, try to take a cocktail waitresses job and then proceed to walk into a wall. Damn, I'm a little jealous.
Commuter bitches be judging your sister and her bag fulla wine. It's a motherfucking ros�, bitch!
Some guy I've never met before just came outside and started rolling a blunt on our fence and passed it around to all six of us. At eight in the morning. Today's gonna be weird.
dropping lines from Workaholics has slowly become my icebreaker when hitting on girls. who would have thought "lets get weird" would cause girls to actually get weird
LEAVE ME AND MY NIPPLES ALONE
He showed up with a hearse full of beer and is currently shooting pumpkins with a flare gun. Who gives a shit if he's a furry. We need to party with him more often.
Randomize
