I just high-fived this girl after she swallowed.
he used a semicolon in his bootycall text, of course he's not gonna go down on me.
we've been at disney 20 seconds and she already got the cops called over
also, I just found three random bruises on my knee. probably from when I was velcrod to the stairs
We sat on the porch laughing about hilarious the sunrise was. And that we can do drugs again in the morning, thank god
I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser.
We were debating whether rain water is clean enough to drink. I won when he started throwing up.
This bitch flirting at the bar needs to close her legs and open up a book. I can literally feel my IQ dropping every time she bends down to show her tits.
Jealous?
Very.
Dating Detox Day 5: had to go out and buy new batteries. this may be harder than I thought
I can taunt you with whatever I want. Like batman and sex.
Can you rollerblade?
No, why?
Honestly, I was high and picturing us roller blading together. I wanted to see if I could make my dreams a reality.
how I know last night was a good night: this morning I found a bottle of tapatio, a bag of chicken and a bag of popcorn in my purse.
I just used a coke ridden $20 bill to buy Girl Scout cookies
You tried to run away last night. The neighbors brought you back.you were in their hot tub again. This needs to stop
Omg I got up from his bed and almost did a header into the wall because I came so many times I forgot how to walk.
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