Chicken burrito, or no deal.
Is that code for my vagina?
Who the fuck has ever referred to a vagina as a chicken burrito
yeah for some reason your penis didn't fit in my mouth the other day
im naked on webcam to her boyfriend, but im playing neopets at the same time, so its all evened out
she was so "full of love" from watching twilight that she came over and gave me a handjob. when does the next movie come out?
My cardio has turned into running out of the cold from bar to bar.
you ever feel like there is a sober person insided you pointing and laughing....?
Just learned the hard way that dicks can bruise the back of your throat to the extent that you cant eat. You're dead to me.
I am burnt. Have a black eye. Face dove into the grass and got pissed on. Time of my life. God Bless the USA.
You may be in san diego, but I just watched a guy in a wheelchair sing walking in memphis for karaoke. Check and mate.
He told me that his favorite part about me is hearing my voice while we fuck. I think that was the nicest thing he has EVER said to me.
Fuck. I have to get my shit together by lunch. Mission impossible.
After 7 months of nothing.. shall we throw your vagina a party? as its reinstatement into society?
Remind me to tell you the story of the fuzzy condom
U wanna come over and watch talidaga nights. Ill make pancakes
What? It's 130 in the morning.
Aww come on i make bomb ass pancakes
Also I know now I was meant to be a comedian. Had both arresting officers laughing.
Randomize
