Came home to a chalk baord that read:" Think like a rapist." Can't say I'm surpirsed.
Last night he was fingering me with one hand to his ear, calling himself 'dj clittles'
Thats what happens when go home with guys that wear shutter shades to the bar..
No one goes out in public like that, unless they do anal
He made a note in his iPhone tonight so that he would remember that I rejected him.
My entire childhood was an ugly sweater party
He just refered to Steak and Shake as "a good place for couples". I will definitely not be shacking tonight.
She just took off her shirt and jumped in the kiddie pool. We're not leaving.
I think showering with 5 people and a half gallon of vodka was one of the best decisions we have ever made.
well its a long story but basically i overcame many cockblocks
I'm going to practice throwing things up the the air and catching them between my boobs, because that seems like a cool party trick.
When you get home...find me in the shower. Only safe place at the moment.
also, sleeping with your chipotle guy sounds like a good idea until you want chipotle on your day off and have to look somewhat presentable to acquire said chipotle.
That was awkward , having sex with her while her husband watched via Skype. I'm a porn star or a target. Idk
I'm getting paid over-time to sit on reddit and look at dicks and abs all day. I'm really happy right now.
He showed up completely drunk with a 30 of PBR and ten cans of Spam. I like this kid.
Randomize
