just saw a girl who had one of those monogrammed backpacks... her initials are VAG. is this a sign?
Just sold a bike on craig's list for 4 four lokos and a 40. How bad do you miss college?
you are getting stockholm syndrome from your pubes
This is even worse then that time I fucked a guy just because he had air conditioning.
side note. good thing you didn't come to drunk breakfast. we were judged by children.
He showed up 3 hours late wearing roller skates and acted like nothing was wrong with that.
He legit asked if he could come over for a hug. I feel like I've been booty called by a 12 year old.
the repo guy said it was the first time he'd ever started to repo a car with someone fucking inside of it. he might have said 'doing it' instead.
We just took back to back grav bong hits and are playing battleship. She guessed Z - 12 so weve switched board games.
I don't think it's food poisoning, I think it's cause you cooked it over burning styrofoam
In my dream I had to eat so many peanut butter and Nutella sandwiches
i want george washington to fuck me as hard as he can holy shit
Does it get any better than dating a guy with a vasectomy? The answer is NO. No it does not
Guy from the bar last night left his number on my waterbill on the counter, at the bottom he put don't forget I can hook you up at Little Caesars I work their part time.
You sure know how to pick em.
You ran full speed into the glass door with your Patron and yelled "FEEL THE RHYTHM, FEEL THE RHYME"
Randomize
