Spraying perfume on pants makes them clean right?
Reason #3 women are better than men: texting and peeing simultaneously. Write THAT in the fucking snow.
im walking the streets of bville with a bag of cat food..looking for my car. i dont ever want to turn 21 again.
i have more money on itunes than i do in my bank account... college.
Literally he has the smallest penis I've ever felt since 8th grade.
Bad idea pregaming graduation.... she just threw up before walking across the stage... i'm gonna miss this
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
He threw up, and left his credit card next to the puddle. He kept on saying he wanted to pay for the damages.
Dude I am not desperate enough to pay my dealer in change. Maybe tomorrow.
I'm not sure if I should be proud of you for having morals or disappointed in you for letting your sex life get this sad.
Well, if it makes you feel any better I'll be drinking tequila and doing lines on Halloween. Just like old days.
Maybe I'm not hungover. Maybe I'm actually dying.
He's perfect in every other way. Is buying him a cockring too forward or just honest?
I know right. I don't even want to have sex today. I did anyway but that's besides the point.
this kid sitting diagonally in front of me is searching "cheap bongs" on google. hahahhaaha. who does this kid think he is?
Randomize
