Black thong, sheer white shorts not a professional look. This chick has no idea what sunlight makes her outfit look like.
i hope not, i just know that at one point I was sitting on the bathroom floor eating bugles and crying because i had no one to show that it looked like I had witch nails when i stuck them on the ends of all ofmy fingers.
It's like my butt was the only innocence I had left and now I don't even have that.
God I feel like the rain man of hangovers.
The car just stinks of weed and we are all sitting here trying to hide it from my mom by rolling down the windows, like it's not coming off my sisters boyfriend
being a senior sucks, I just started embracing my inner slutty college girl, and it's almost time to put her away...for like, ever. and i really like her.
She said she liked strap-ons.
SHE WAS TALKING ABOUT SHOES, YOU ASSHOLE! YOU'RE THE WORST WINGMAN EVER!
Giiiirl. Just had a BM that almost killed me.
You having your own car has severely reduced the amount of blowjobs I get.
Actually, lets be honest. I will probably keep calling him the pastor because it brings me joy using pastor and fuck buddy in the same sentence.
This is like a walk of shame down memory lane.
I woke up to Dragon Ball Z playing in Portuguese and a donut shish-kebab~ed on a dick in my face.
Validation I posted a good pic? The lonely fuckboys send out the booty call signal. Of course I answered the call; Gotham needs its hero.
We lost. I'mma go home and drink more and do a face mask and wonder why it is that god put me on this Earth to suffer
What? I'll do just about anything if you give me a sticker.
Randomize
