she's like the human form of herpes, as soon as you think she's gone for good you have another out break.
just rolled a joint with wrapping paper.. and you say i have no christmas spirit
new years resolution, not be in jail at midnight for 3rd year in a row.
ambylanc
what?
there was an amgbulance. iw ish i was in it.
Its 6am and I'm sitting on the couch watching Clifford. Crying into my risotto because emily elizabeth helped the girl in the wheelchair get over her stagefright so she can win a trophy. Never drinking alone again.
We had hangover sex and then I called a taxi home. Told him I didn't want his number because, if it was meant to be, we would fuck again. He called me the queen of one night stands.
he bit THROUGH my nipple
plus side, no need to pay for a piercing.
mid-october of freshman year. goals have shifted from "no more guys on my floor" to "all the guys on my floor."
a guy just skateboarded past my window in a bunny suit while chased by a dog walker
too bad burritos don't cuddle back
also. got fucked to usher last night. dunno if thats a new high or a new low
Was it at least a good usher song?
New goal find someone I love enough to use these Japanese pancake flavored condoms on
I just walked across town, stoned off my ass and barefoot in 35 degree weather for him to bust five mins in and then apologize 13 times as I got dressed.
Is it wrong to want to have sex with one guy who's good in bed before going out on a date with a guy I actually like?
I'm drinking because I just started here and every single person I work with wants to quit and when I asked a coworker how she's doing she literally just started crying.
Randomize
