I wish i was in the wii world.
There is a banner on a house by campus that says "welcome to college dads. Thanks for dropping off your daughters!"
Note to all middle aged "I totally let myself go after childbirth" frumpy mothers: I do not dress this way for your husbands. Stop looking at me like that. It's not my fault.
Haha its ok. When we got back you sat in the car and attempted to tell me in sign language you were blacked out lol
you should be careful. everyone knows your chances of pregnancy increase by 100 percent when youre the daughter of a religious figure
My only regret is not throwing up on the conveyor belt in the dining hall
Um. That's my cat Laura. You put my cat in your mouth, and then you put my cat in your purse.
Think of where it's been though. That Dr. Suess book, "Oh the Places You'll go" was written for his penis.
you called me at 4 in the morning and invited me over for pasta and a late night viewing of titanic.
Do you know how hard it is to maintain a conversation with someone who just told you they put their cat in the fridge on purpose?
I love that my family celebrates every holiday with a joint. Chanukah? Mazel-juana! Easter? What's more spring than the color green? Election day? What better way to celebrate democracy in action than medical pot?
Legal advice please. Can you sue someone for jerking off to photos of you?
I'm hungover and in a fort. And I hate you.
So many questions
Tonights mission: get trashed, smoke a bowl on top of the silo, get some dick. Not necessarily in that order.
So he called his lawyer from the bar to confirm the cost of hitting the douchebag before flooring him. I respect his planning skills.
Randomize
