what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
I hope my margaritas pass through security.
So, I picked up my 7 ft tall lamp post and used it to close my door. I feel quite accomplished.
God, i just love slightly insecure guys with hearts of gold and giant penises.
while i was sleeping he changed my screen saver to his dick with a heart frame around it. I just might be falling in love.
It's not like I'm never gonna put out again. I'm a sure thing. I promise.
We should celebrate the resignation of Berlusconi tonight with too many bottles of wine and sambuca. We're allies, right?
is it bad that my walk of shame involves the church shuttle?
Ran into my neighbor that's always crying. I wonder if she's like; "I ran into my neighbor who's always playing with her vibrator?"
Hey your work video crashed my computer. The 8 pornos running in the other window didn't. Congratulations.
I will kick you in all of your body parts. All at once.
Why do I always end up with closet ICP fans?
Also, being stuck with my family all week has made it very clear that I need to be drunk and I need to be fucked pronto
I apologize in advance for the number of sex toys drying on the bathroom sink.
congratulations on joining the accidental bisexual club
Randomize
