i hope my daughter doesn't end up with cankles. no guy likes cankles.
Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
i can smell the iron from margo's period blood from across the table.
Olympics start in one day, that gives us 24hrs to think of gold medal worthy drinking games
sorry can't make it tonight, greg's getting back from italy. he's had two weeks of carbs and no gym; now's my chance to get myself a piece of that newly-fat, low self-esteemed ass.
It isn't possible and the very mindfuck of that concept gives me a lady boner.
yeah the cable guy is coming and everybody is hiding all the pieces in the house. we are up to thirty two. like a fun game of smokable scavener hunt.
I'm ready to take a few years of my life this weekend
the bride at the wedding we just crashed said we can stay only if we strip for her. You need to get down here
I will kick you in all of your body parts. All at once.
You know you're hung over when the glare from the cream cheese on your bagel is just too bright...
Of course I'm using oj as a mixer, its flu season.
Well now you know not to take drugs from your friends. Take it from stangers. They're more reliable.
ok but bondage is pretty much my easy mode
Vegas never ceases to amaze me. Hung out with a stripper from ATL all night and got nuthin, but the next night meet a bride-to-be who gives me a bj in the elevator.
Randomize
