You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
why do our vaginas work when we are blacked out?? it's just not fair.
Remind me to tell you the "if you give a mouse a special brownie" story when you get back
I HATE DRINKING WITH JUST GIRLS, ITS 1030 THEYRE ALL HAMMERED AND TALKING ABOUT HOW AWESOME THEIR SHOES ARE!!!!!!!
just so you know, you can get through airport security with handcuffs no questions asked
Well, find something you can use as a snorkel and be aware of your surroundings.
I am trapped in a bar with french tattooed drug dealers who also blow glass art. Just in case this is bad, know what happened.
woke up holding a soft boiled egg cup and empty bottle of rum. apparently i couldn't find a shot glass
You got kicked out after 30 minutes, 3 beers and 2 shots. Group record. Also you kept rubbing his belly and calling him buddha.
I hate you so much right now. You got us kicked out of my favorite bar because your drunk ass was hogging the Bluetooth jukebox and would play NOTHING but that goddamn skeleton song. IT'S NOT EVEN OCTOBER YET.
Spopky scrzy skeletonssz
I didnt realize until i got your email that what i've been missing in my life is someone to send me dog gifs
I think everyone, including the amish, know who you are after this weekend.
Update: just imagined being dirty talked to in an Irish brogue and I think my vagina became a sentient being.
this is honestly why we're friends. we drink tea and plan to do drugs together.
dont you DARE use my tequila influenced words against me
Randomize
