i was so high that i was eating crumbs of my bed only to realize they were fuzz thingies. fml.
sorry for making everyone realize you look like bruce jenner
the choice between paying your electricity bill and getting herpes medicine is a tough one.
So two questions...why am I covered in muffins and are there pictures of this.
So I've been to the library twice so far. Both times were for the atm, and once I was stoned. Junior year is going great.
Just paid a $5 cover at a bar I stumbled by so I could puke in a toilet and not in public.
I'm drinking wine alone, eating leftovers, and cleaning my sex toys. For the love of god, do not graduate.
I was gonna tell her, but there were too many tongues in my mouth
I wish I could just hang out in ERs.
came home to a trail of roses from the door halfway up the stairs. but my nonsingle roommate lives downstairs. idk if they celebrated on the stairs or if some girl tried to woo me last night and i don't remember
Also I've decided that I'm buying the next friend of mine who is dumb enough to get married a live porcupine as a wedding present.
It was a fight. Me vs nature and drunkenness. And nature won. Big time.
I lied. Can't workout today. Only exercises I'm currently capable of doing are breathing ones to keep last night's drinks ending up all over the classroom.
All I want to do is ice my pussy, but then my husband would probably infer that I was not at a business meeting last night.
I just sustained a forearm injury dancing to salt n peppa in my kitchen. Fack. I pushed it real good.
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