u cheatin on me?
if i did i would try to upgrade babe.
She tried to have sex with him but he quote unquote respected her
no its okay don't call 911, she's alive. just stopped by her house and banged on her door. she said she turned her phone off because she "had to be alone with her shame and embarassment". typical.
I'm high, and her 2,100 tagged pictures annoy me even MORE. I wish it had a google searchbar so I could type in "cleavage pics" to get to the point.
he had two deer mounted on his dorm room wall with panties and bras hanging from the antlers... i cant believe i contributed to bambi's headgear...
any interest in drunk sledding later? if not, any interest in driving me to the hospital later?
found a rock and smashed the sliding glass door. home safe. screen door is locked so we're good.
Honey, I don't care how "classic you" this is. It's not gonna matter if we can't find you in the morning.
He left npr on the whole time when we were doing it. ironic that i lost it on the 100th anniversary of the titanic. thanks michelle norris.
you were making out with a guy that looked like Fat Albert, I kicked you in the vagina but you didn't stop
It's a "party harder or raise your standards" kind if night.
We're like adult pinky and the brain when they decided that taking over the world is unrealistic so they aim lower by trying to get drunk every day.
he stopped talking to me, quit his job, moved out of the province and then told me it was "no big" when I called him apologizing...
Because you failed to stop the wedding, now I have to be a homewrecker. My eternal damnation is on your head I hope you're proud.
So what you're saying is that The Magic Kingdom is ruining our plans to get laid?
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