i now know how you feel when you have to walk me home. she ran into a streetlight and into garbage.
he was lying next to me and i saw him text "score" to someone.
Why did that cocktail waitress get to sleep with Tiger for 2 years, and all I ever got for living in Whorelando for five years is a couple of pictures with Joey Fatone
I just had sex in a moon bounce. It is all down hill from here.
Fire inspection over. Blunts are OK
If a Romanian girl's marriage isn't considered legal in the US then she's fair game right?
Also, you peed on your hand last night. Id just like to point that out
Uhm; your sign says 'Welcome to KFC' and for some reason I can't seem to open the door.
He gave me the award for most entertaining blow job. That should count for something.
I don't want random pictures of your morning wood. It's like, what a glorious morning oh a penis.
It may be a clusterfuck, but I'll be looking classy as shit as I watch the nightmare unfold
Well we found Mark's missing underwear. They're pinned up on Mike's trophy wall.
Umm... When he walked in I shot him with my confetti gun... It's a wonder my booty calls even show up.
You had sex with a Scottish dude with a peg leg....how could I NOT tell that story??
We're so high we're eating flavored lube.
Randomize
