Once again you get dinner and all I get is semen on my leg
i can totally see doctors naming an STD after you
I'll give her a pass for the first one, but after the second threesome, she should have learned her lesson.
Well let's just say that she ended up trying to get it in with the wheelchair guy, who btw, can get an erection and quickly I might add
I just took my birth control on the way to class with a 1/2 melted jello shot I happened to find in my purse from Friday night. I told you I was going hard this year.
seriously considering responding to a craigslist ad for a lesbian cunninlingus instructor...at this point i'm so desperate for a job that i'm willing to switch teams.
Opened my purse to realize I have someone else's birth certificate. What happens to me in college?
We have a vagina exchange agreement. Neither of us can hook up with any of our own law firm's summer associates. So we have a scout and referral program and invite each other to the other firm's summer events. Criss-cross!! Works every summer.
Hungover, threw up in a cosmetic case in my car this morning. This is real life.
he's just got his life so together and it makes my pussy wet.
Sigh. I haven't seen a dick since August 22nd. And in case you forgot, it's January.
Definitely went down on him last night while he was wearing a cape. He randomly kept swirling it around me and "revealing me" in the mirror like a magic trick. I'm not even a little upset, it's fun fucking younger guys.
EVEN AFTER ALL THAT COMPLAINING... STILL NO PENIS
Heading there now. Already have a boner.
So naked ping pong was a mistake... Looks like we were attacked by an octopus.
Randomize
