As long as they suck a good dick I don't care what fruit they have and where they have it
I may have just googled Muppet Treasure Island drinking game
She said her first boyfreind was so small she is still technically a virgin.
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
we are cloud gazing and there is one that looks like a giant baby riding a dolphin and smoking a joint
i wish there was a reasonable explanation for why this reminds me of you
Dude you didn't move for like 2 hours then suddenly sang the chorus to ghetto superstar and passed back out
I've never seen the starbucks guy more terrified than when you dove out the car window after your credit card
If i spent $300 & took that thing home i would hate myself today.
1 month til my stepdad becomes a u.s. citizen, so if you want to get in on the divorce pool its your last chance, $5 a square.
How many tongue depressors should I need to steal from urgent care to make samurai armor?
And apparently i asked another younger guy at the bar if he wanted his bud light pumped straight into his vag. As i put back an irish car bomb...
I think I just smoked a piece of your foot. Were u picking your feet by the weed?
I just got the most majestic image of a potato sack full of dildos getting whipped at your head in slow motion.
And some neighbor just saw me naked and hunched over a bag of potato chips stuffing my face. Maybe clothes aren't a bad idea.
I could see the visible disappointment when she saw my penis
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