is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
is it bad that the economy has gotten so bad that finding cheap gas gives me the same excitement and joy as finding a hot, blonde haired, blue eyed, tall, athletic single straight guy?
She made me repeat after her: "I take responsibility for what I put in my own mouth."
how do flat chested girls get laid?
My girlfriend and my fuck buddy both started their periods this weekend. The good news is, neither of them are pregnant. The bad news is, I'll have to find someone else to fuck til next weekend. No wait.....that's good news too.
Oh and you pulled your pants down outside in front of like five people, held my hand, then peed.
The only thing I remember is doing a toddlers and tiaras dance routine onstage. I fucking CURTSIED.
OMG stop. Pretty feet? Sparkle baby!
I rather not break my neck. It's hard to look sexy with a neck cast.
Trust no bitch in laser tag. Not a single one.
He told me he wished he could shrink down to a small size so he could live inside my cleavage
I have a bottle of vodka wrapped in a leg warmer in my purse. This is what it takes to get through Christmas with my family.
Seriously, he's as bad as Joffrey. I hope this ends like Game Of Thrones did.
It turned from Netflix and chill to cringeworthy YouTube videos and chill. At least he's honest.
I DIDN'T WATCH THE PILLSBURY DOUGH BOY PORN!!!!
And by "have lunch together" you mean me giving you a blow job in the back of your Tahoe, right?
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