id be glad to
I am at The Loft in SoNo, and there are two girls within arms reach that are making out with each other AGGRESIVELY. Like I can see 100% of a boob
For future reference, this is Trevors little sisters phone now. Trevs number is 484 XXX XXXX. Great story tho
That bar we were at last night smelled like cougars. Virginia Slims, Aqua Net and Summer's Eve.
i don't know what the guinness world record is for longest time eating nothing but skittles but i'm going on six days
its like fishing. just send her some cock shots to keep her on the hook then use tequila to reel her in
My afternoon will now be spent googling genital warts. I think my life is over.
Definitely contact high. Thirty miles an hour listening too i can see clearly now wanting too eat the steering wheel
I haven't found him passed out in the living room covered in noodles for a while now so I guess he's getting better with the drinking.
I'm pretty sure you and I ate the entire Keebler elf weed workshop
WHY ARE THERE NO BLACK EMOJIS? I CAN NEVER PROPERLY IDENTIFY MYSELF.
I got an assistant at work. First task was picking me up at a strip club. I was drunk and trying explain how it was work related
I sent her a picture of Richard Nixon and said "these are the only dick pics I send".
So it's safe to say that it's all down hill from here
Do you mean easy livin or downward spiral of alcoholism and disappointment
I sent him a tit pic on accident and he replied with "nice ass"
Can you please stop having such an active social life? I'm tryna get fucked over here
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