I dont understand how a fully grown man could convince himself that lime green crocks would look good on him.
we lost you for like an hour and then found you at some dive bar trying to teach dance lessons
So apparently I ran down the hall to another party and started handing out uncooked spaghetti to strangers. You'd be surprised how many drunk people will eat raw noodles.
He didn't seem too mad about the puke on the side of his car. You still have a chance.
The gym is handing out free condoms this week, motivation to work out this week?
sorry can't make it tonight, greg's getting back from italy. he's had two weeks of carbs and no gym; now's my chance to get myself a piece of that newly-fat, low self-esteemed ass.
I'm very fluent in vodka, but that seems to be a whiskey dialect.
I just tripped out to the Angel of Music from Phantom of the Opera in my car. Wayyyy to high for shuffle right now.
I was to tired to jerk him off, so he made me hold it while he thrusted into my hand.
Well at one point he got ahold of my archery gear.. And I. Shit. You. Not. Sarah took an arrow to the knee.
The best part of last night was the women's softball game on the TV at the strip club
Drinking vodka and pirating music in the library. Welcome to finals week.
the bartender knew what was up when i took a sip of my drink, gagged and asked her to water down my water
Good god, my descendants are going to be fucked.
answer honestly do you think i can make a bloody mary with ketchup????
Randomize
