It's not a real calculator it's a math calculator
he just referred to himself as the billy mays of his frat.. heres how to order
im so hungover...we just watched The Perfect Storm and i got seasick
and when he finished he started shouting "swim boys SWIM"
they're using the ping pong table for ping pong. it's weird
So we went to home depot to buy supplies to build a beer bong but ended up buying an office water cooler that were going to put vodka in
No, man, we stole the housekeeper's key and we're just going room to room raiding mini fridges. Hurry
Logan has the vodka and snickers. We're making a run for it. Room 302
Post-sex nachos deserve a song.
Honestly I'm not even that excited to see my boyfriend. I'm more excited to see his penis. His penis inside of me.
Omg have I shown you my skeezy ex fiancée?
The other one.
Just jacked in the family restroom in the hospital while eating beef jerky and looking at reddit gone wild.
Sweet! It'll be a "that-minor-I-used-to-serve-alcohol-to-is-no-longer-a-minor" party!!!
What's rude is him not accepting my blowjob offer. What kind of guy denies that.
You woke up in between the boxspring and the matress in a random dorm room.
Okay well for one he didn't speak any english but before any happened he made me use the translator to consent
Randomize
