I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
Jake was my 1st thought but I seriously thought u already did him... & then there's the getting the clap story... so I settled on Ben for my guess.
I have done Jake, not Ben. But this was fresh meat. And P.S. it was ghonnerea.
Ahh, yes. It's apparently too early in the morning to keep your partners and their std's straight.
Do you reaalllllly want to put "porn editor" on your resume?
He was so confused why there was a string hanging out of my vagina.
I don't even know how sober sex starts anymore
He taught me how to drive a stick by using his dick. He even made the whurrrr noise so I knew when to change gears.
Wella between the drunkards, the inevitable slutty costumes, and someone doing a BODY SHOT OFF A PREGNANT GIRL, i lost my halloween spirit. Bah humbug.
all of the sudden, the other guy at the bar who was celebrating his birthday got a super inspired look on his face and then screamed at me ''our parents fucked on the same day!''
i threw up in a box in my own lap driving today.
Her idea of kinky involved a tazer
wtf?
I'm going back tonight
Sorry, It's like OkCupid Olympics... categories: best sext, best dick pic, and most effort by ugly. You won gold in the last event if that makes you feel better.
idk how I feel so profoundly understood by someone whose latest tweet is "labia majora's mask." but I do.
Only you could go on vacation to visit family and hook up with a pro NFL player from Tinder
2016 shall be rememered as the year I sharted while putting up the Christmas tree.
I'm sorry about the fire. I was too fucked up to do science, apparently.
Randomize
