just smoked a bowl with my history teacher. i love community college
Most guys don't get turned on by "skinny, gangly legged girl with glasses laying in bed touching herself." You better start working on your diction if you're gonna keep up the sexting.
Everytime I cough, my tampon falls out a little bit. Does this mean I'm loose?
I was gonna make fun of her but that plan kinda stopped once she put my dick in her mouth
12 garbage cans filled with water, a beer can floating in every garbage can, 20 ft. apart and you shoot with dodge balls..and thats only how the night began
You're just telling me nice things because you came in my eye.
He has a really nice penis but its like a model that wasn't built to scale
Thank you as well. My penis is starting a slow-clap right now.
I was just stopped at a stop sign waiting for the moon to turn green.
Just had a tv talk show interview in my mirror. Got into to some pretty heavy shit man, would have made good viewing.
Sudden memory flashback: drunk me outside ripping my tampon out and throwing it into the neighbors yard, silently cheering 'time for sexxxx'. I sense a dangerous pattern emerging
This is love.
Which part? The alcoholic cupcakes or the lesbian st paddys day party?
michael burned off one of his eyebrows making a pizza so he had to shave off the other one to make it look even. it doesn't look right, but I'd still bang him.
Everyday this week I have woken up to a different dick pic. It's like a dick pic a day calendar!
I just wrote a self loathing message to self, wrapped my credit card in it, put it in an envelope, sealed it with another hate messame, and put it in my lock box. So. That's where I'm at.
Randomize
