I have no idea who these bands are he's listening to. If his current playlist was a pandora station, however, it would be titled "music for closet cock gobblers"
What happened last night?
You soiled yourself again and told everybody that you'd given birth.
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
she just gave me a present from you... on a stripper pole. in front of the whole club. :)
WHY ISNT THIS A PICTURE MESSAGE
If you're trying to piece together your night, I can tell you where those tassels came from.
she just came into my room, drunkenly shoved six dollars into my bra and told me to spend it on chicken wings.
Thanks for pulling me out of the bed by my feet atleast one of us was sober enough to know I had work at 5 am.
I'm not as easy in Europe as I am in the US
Only because you can wipe your slut slate clean & start anew. It's a little known benefit of our currency exchange.
An don't say it's "personal preference" cause I don't buy it. I just want to have normal cool guy balls. I don't want to be the dude that's still rocking the equivalent of the "mid 90's bowl cut" of scrotum haircuts.
I mean I sucked his dick at 3 AM... UNDERWATER. I think I have earned a follow back on twitter.
Yeah I just don't know how I feel about my fuck buddy coming to work at my dads office with me.
I definitely think you should enjoy one last spring break being a sorostitute before you get serious and settle down with price charming. I mean hes not going to be there any way. he can wait a week.
I feel awkward having to tell people “sorry you can’t finger me because I will get a UTI and I don’t have health insurance”
Look don't ask questions just know that one thing led to another and I have a shot glass stuck in my ass. I need your help!!!
If he didn’t pick us up we would have been jerkwards eating sad pancakes at a Denny’s.
Randomize
