From the crime scene it appears that I attempted to throw up into a candle.
I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
is it a bad thing if he can only get off when i start talking like one of the girls from Jersey Shore??
No I remember falling down the stairs I just don't remember it hurting.
I have a ginormous moral hangover. Strip club blues.
i no longer feel bad for not doin my schoolwork. im watching a porn in french. this MUST qualify as studying.
i woke up next to a ladle and a packet of chocolate biscuits that my face had melted into one giant biscuit.
good it was pretty cute, also what would bong water do to a puppy?
She may be a slut, but at least she's a dedicated slut. She's always super tan and has her shit shaved in really cool designs.
I'm not surprised. You have the libido of an Italian soccer team.
There's a bachlorette party going on at the bowling alley, so we'll see who wins greatest shitshow tonight.
he brings me coffee and gets a blow job. not sure if I trained him or he trained me or it's simply mutually beneficial beautiful.
He told me to leave him behind and bury him in his batman pajamas. So two lessons I guess, don't give Tom whiskey and don't touch his daddy issues with a twenty nine and a half foot pole.
My professor just told my lab he could drive us around town in his 1991 Lincoln towncar limo for our bar crawl. This just keeps getting better!
Soooooooo high. David tried to rinse the water droplets out of the sink for 5 minutes
Randomize