You feel like going out tonight?
Does a 14yr-old girl look good beat up? I'll bring the handle
Nice meating you last night
Not a typo
My dad hugged me and said I love u. I'm glad I didn't pull out that night.
even if everyone didnt know them screaming eskimo brothers and high fiveing over my head kinda gave it away
I wish we couldve been like jesus and the desiples tongith
We're discussing which museums we should go to when we shroom. How ill would Picasso be?
I'd like to say yes, but I nearly lost my shit when I assumed there was no back to my house. I am not strong enough for hallucinations.
Maybe I'll make your dreams come true and pee on you tomorrow.
The alcohol just runs so smoothly thru my veins.
that's right. bitches got laser pointers. let's fuck shit up
The forecast for tonight is alcohol and low expectations.
You're the only meteorologist I listen to.
He used the term 'cock-staggering' in an email. So needless to say things are going pretty well.
He just peed in the cab. I repeat..IN.
woke up. showered n got ready. had sex. and was still 15 minutes early to work... its gonna be a good day!
It's an interesting experience to pee while a bird meows at you.
You need to get out of the house more
Randomize
