What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
Hahaha I asked him about her bjs and he said "I would not wish that on anyone"
The last thing I want is a chocolate mold of my cock competing with my real cock for time spent in your mouth
Nah, he's definitely here somewhere. Whether he survived the night or not is your problem, but I'm pretty sure he's around.
i had an epiphany while laying on the driveway for 5 hours yesterday.
i realized i waste a lot of time
A gay dude just spanked me with a nicholas sparks novel and called me foxy. I'm putting this on my resume.
Do one night stands count towards my number?
Yes. A penis is a penis
Even bad ones?
YES.
I can't believe you won 5 grand from the casio last night and spent more than 80% on tacobell and strippers already
I don't give a shit if you judge. This isn't about you or anyone else. This is about me and my chicken tenders.
Spent tonight painting strippers in camo.
Have you ever given your heart and soul to someone and they turn out to be nothing but a great fuck that makes a mean grilled cheese because same
just woke up on the floor with a bottle in my hand. and by bottle, i mean a baby bottle. half filled with tequila.
None of these texts make sense. except for "step 2.5 equals velociraptor." that i get.
I'm sorry for chipping my tooth on your vagina last night :(
Randomize
