How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
u know what's depressing? a picture of an owl without a graduation cap
taking shots each time the weatherman says Dont go out in this blizzard
Family of uber douches all wearing ed hardy in a hummer taking up 2 parking spots at starbucks. Please be more cliche
I made the bartender pinky promise me there was still vodka in my drinks.
Can you bring me a pair of sunglasses to the bathroom please... Don't judge me.
He hit on a bridal shower w/ his hand on my tit the entire time. Gave his number to the mom.
Hey have you ever thought about fishing cause I'd like to go fishing but don't know anyone that fishes and I'm gonna cry because. FISHING
I WISH WE COULD PLAY THE DRINKING GAME TOGETHER AND THEN BANG FOR AMERICA.
Is it rude to ask for an autograph after giving him a blowjob in their hotel's hot tub?
Btw any and all sexual fantasies or arousal I had about cops is null and void.
If I could figure out how to do him with his wranglers on you would never see me again.
Looks like it rained condoms in my room last night
Does it still count as a threesome if one girl left halfway through cause we were having too much sex?
Fuck you for even being able to ask that question
You literally snort drugs up your nose and you’re questioning the brand of the multivitamin right now?
Randomize
