garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
There is somethin about your sexuality that makes my dick do jumping jacks when I see you
The visine ive been using for four yrs expired. in sept. of 2001.....i will never question my eye problems again.
5 Four Lokos being cheaper than a case should be illegal.
This hangover is way worse than all my relationships
In all fairness I did warn the guy I just spray tanned before we had sex so I hold no responsibility for the bronzer all over his sheets
well what is some mechanical horse racing with out blow involved
She's like my safety school. At the end of the night, if I haven't found anyone better to hook up with, I can always call her if I need a place to drop a load and don't want to rub one out myself. Perfect next door neighbor.
Was my shirt on fire at any point last night? Because I'm fairly sure my shirt was on fire.
not totally sure where im at but i think i've definitely woken up on this couch before. bong on the coffee table looks familiar. should be able to find my way home
I took a sleeping pill while he was in the bathroom. Time for a game of how long can we bang before I fall asleep.
You are both horrible and amazing
a guy just walked through our campsite, crouched down by the truck, screamed "ACID ONLY LASTS FOR 8 HOURS RIGHT?!", then ran off into the bushes
dad is drunk and texting us pictures of bread
I cannot pick him out of a line up. I remember he is blonde and his half flaccid dick looks like gonzo. So unless he pulls down his pants I don't know who he is
I just put on the jeans I was wearing last night and pulled 4 baby carrots out of my back pocket....
Randomize
