no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
He muttered something about having just washed he sheets, then demanded I give him all my quarters.
Please sleep at your girlfriend's tonight
Why?
'Cause I wanna jack off tonight.. And you being in the room makes things awkward
Man the liquor store just wrong numbered me, its a sign even god wants me to drink
I feel like college is just an experience in what names I can't name my future son.
That's like.....u just dangled a sex carrot in front of me then took it away!
ANNA HAS DISCOVERED EROTIC FANFICTION OF SHARKNADO THIS IS NOT A DRILL
he started frosting cupcakes and licking the mini-spatula realllllly deliberately and i don't know if i'm more attracted to him or the cupcakes
"Yeah because the first thing I think of when I hear the word college is tear gas."
They are going to name an STD after you.
You let someone poor beer into my mouth off of a balcony. Best friend test failed.
Haahahahahahhaaa
after what u told me last night I think we're past the wtf zone and at this point u should just join me in wondering if my barista lover is a gay porn star
I can't. I mean he's hot, but there's really nothing else there
You just said he's hot
NO YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND
Slept in and having coffee. No sounds of whipping and no veiny dildos next to me. This is good. How's your mornin?
My body isnt used to all this fresh air, sun and booze....ok well maybe just the fresh air and sun...its used to the booze.
Randomize
