Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
Pls stop me from telling anyone else my broken blood-vessel + splint are "climax-related" injuries.
whispering "taste the rainbow" well having sex isn't my biggest turn on.
I would ask why there is a chair tied to the door of the fridge.. but I am not sure anyone knows the answer.
Hypothetically speaking, what is the proper response if one gets bitten by a most likely not rabid squirrel? Hypothetically.
Do you know why I have a burn shaped like a tiny spork?
I'm not a horrible person, I just see what everyone chooses to politely ignore.. And occasionally say it aloud whilst deeply intoxicated.
I didnt realize how badly my legs were scratched up from power-fucking him in the bushes until kate dumped a bottle of vodka on me. that shit burnedddd
it was like a shit fog rolling out of the east to encompass me and have it's way with me
Hey nothing wrong with those! I can't believe the guys who let me see where they live on first dates. Even more surprising, I don't stalk them after they've done me wrong.
I didn't want to leave, I wanted to move into his ass
Are we DOING anything for lunch...if sex is involved, let's just be straight forward and stop wasting the first half hour! We just need to get to the point
You walked in with a bag of weed and asked for a watermelon. For some reason they actually gave you one, and you made it into a perfectly working bong. Two of them offered their girlfriends to you for the night.
And then he tried to convince me that he could wear a condom instead of pants to go out.
The work outs are working. Someone just said my body type was “Tits On A Stick”.
Randomize
