Midget sex pt 2 tonight
my weekend in 10 words or less: hot friend of a friend, open bar, beach house, sore. In that order too.
So I'm cool with the whole break up, but it sure is a shame we didn't get to use those handcuffs.
I feel like I got hit by a truck made out of Jack Daniels.
she must've caught on when i went out for a "run" in jeans and a sweatshirt and came back holding a McDonalds bag and smelling like pot.
Her boobs are too amazing to be looking at my dick. I'm even ashamed.
Needless to say they were not happy to find out that we braided their hair together, when one of them woke up needing to puke bad
I cannot even. Taco bell reception. Beers. New friends from Georgia.
Remember when we pinky swore we'd never feel hungover alone...
the thing I didn't realize I would miss about college is that at home you can't just dismiss your sex bruises as drunk accidents
So I can confidently say that I'm the only 3rd year engineering student who completed all 4 of their exams with One Direction pens
Oh and an honorable mention for your father's porn collection. Things I'll never forget.
I dont pretend to understand how the heterosexual mind works. Its a mysterious cavern of stupidity and disgusting sexual acts.
Im so sorry for peeing on your chest.
Can you dump a guy for having pierced nipples or is that shallow?
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